5 Causes Of Dysfunctional Sexuality
One of the growing concerns in the Youth Culture and the world today is dysfunctional sexuality. And it manifests itself in many ways. Maybe foremost is pornography, illicit relationships, a lack of respect for people, and ultimately the Human Trafficking rise globally. No doubt Human Trafficking is one of the more tragic outcomes of our dysfunctional sexuality.
A Biblical Definition of Sexuality
To be clear, my conviction on The Sexual Revolution, including gender, marriage, and sexual immorality is simple. I have not based this conviction on my understanding of culture. I have based it on my understanding of scripture. I have shaped my belief over the years through the biblical account of creation in Genesis, Jesus’ words in Matthew, and Paul's words in Romans, 1 Corinthians 6-7, and Galatians 5. As well as other texts in 1 Timothy and Revelation.
The Genesis Intent (Genesis 1-3), or, the creation intent. This is the first and foundational rule to sexuality. It is a theology of firsts and types. Where God defines sexuality. There is no confusion on Male or Female in scripture. And there is no mention or need for a ‘third way’ or ‘transition’ or ‘neutral’ gender.
The Matthew Intent (Matthew 5, 15, 19), or, the messianic intent. This is Jesus on sexuality. And he quotes the OT words of Moses from Genesis. Isn’t that interesting? Jesus could have EVOLVED. He could have ADJUSTED to His day. But His definition of sexuality was taken from the creation or Genesis intent.
My conviction:
Here is the first thing that I say when asked about the sexual revolution today:
1. Our personal sexuality belief will come from culture or from scripture. It is the ideological and theological framework. It will be changing if it comes from culture, but, it will be constant if it comes from scripture. That is why the arguments have changed in the cultural arena and yet have stayed the same in the scriptural arena.
2. I know that we look at and interpret scripture differently. But there are enough clear guidelines in scripture to agree on.
3. There are constants in human sexuality theology - Genesis 1-3 and Matthew 5, 15, and 19, and Romans 1 are theological foundations of human sexuality. These are the words of Moses, Jesus, and Paul.
4. In these texts, Moses, Jesus, and Paul did have something to say about human sexuality. Definitions or prohibitions related to gender, marriage, sexual immorality (adultery, fornication, prostitution, idolatry, abnormality, incest, beastiality, and homosexuality) even if they did not directly address the specific word of the topic in question.
5. What we do know conclusively from these texts, is that each kept marriage and sexual relations within marriage between a man and a woman. And God created two binary genders in the human species – male and female. Any deviation from that form or ethic was not the creation intent or Jesus’ support of it or Paul’s address of it and becomes a secondary un-natural order; a cultural or personal order and not a scriptural order. And because of any new unnatural order or ethic, mankind must do mid-course correction to bring our ideas, experience, and feelings back to scripture.
6. There are many other verses inspired by the Holy Spirit to authors (including Paul in 1 Corinthians 6, Galatians 5, 1 Timothy 1 and John in Revelation 18, 21) who spoke on this subject. All of these author’s words have these original texts from Moses and Jesus as foundational unity on their address to the subject.
7. Our differences should not divide us. So we have a different interpretation of sexuality in the scriptures than some people may have. Maybe you believe, as I have stated in this book, that marriage is between a man and a woman, that sex before marriage, outside of your marriage, or with the same sex is sin, and that God created humanity male and female. But just because someone believes differently than we do, what right does that give us to treat them with partiality or judgement?
I contend that what we really need is a box. A code, or ceiling, or walls, and fence. Because otherwise, we land where we are today. With everyone analyzing and giving their own version of truth. Sure, we may read the same biblical text and see different things. But, there are some absolutes even in scripture. The important part of this parse to me is really simple. And that is making the determination of the argument by scripture and not culture. From an absolute box.
Soundbites:
It really is hard to get down to a soundbite in such an information age. But maybe this will help you get to your conviction on this matter as you read the scriptures yourself.
But this is my soundbite when I am asked:
The foundational truth of human sexuality is that God said He created them Male and Female and told them to come together as a family and to perpetuate the human race. That’s it. No other choice. No third way. No options for same gender marriage or unions. Or sexual relations outside of this intent. Whatever ideas or trends would come through the ages in culture that are non-conforming to the Genesis Intent of human sexuality are not God’s order.
What I want to focus quickly upon are 5 causes of dysfunctional sexuality: loneliness, social media access, bullying, the break-up of the family, and a diminishing role of the Church. Few other things are contributing so heavily to Human Trafficking than these. a wicked scheme to lure a generation away from their creator and vital relationships is unparalleled. A life of slavery to lust, drugs, sex, or even a vocational opportunity and billions of dollars is luring. But, there are things that we can do to stop this movement.
Here's how these conversations of dysfunctional sexuality with teens go:
LONELINESS - I have had many conversations with teenagers who are lonely and not one of them like it. They were craving conversation and healthy relationship. Go out of your way to speak to a teenager. It may not only save their life, but, it may save many lives because teens will find conversation and not be preyed upon by strangers. conversation can become the first line of defense against slavery.
SOCIAL MEDIA - In speaking with hundreds of teens about social media use, they admit that it is out of control. Yet, the shallow conversation, pornography, and global information base that is social media is relentless. A disciplined handling of mobile phones and computers and the internet is elementary to raising our children. without practices, their principles will be dashed.
BULLYING - Many students have told me you either have to bully or get bullied. That is where our relationships are at in this teenage generation today. students needs tribes (groups to be accepted in). yes, Tribes are important and can be safe. But, creating doors in tribes is crucial so that we do not alienate students from each other. every social setting has a group and a subgroup. movement and acceptance between them is vital. Respect for each other is crucial to healthy sexual thinking.
BROKEN FAMILY - The more teens I speak with the more I find that teens are not only being raised in a fatherless generation, or a motherless generation. They are being raised without their siblings also. the family structure has been destroyed. and this is the safest place to teach children healthy sexual principle. And the loss of each of these relationships is fatal to a teenager. How many times did your big brother or sister speak into your dating life? Whether you want to admit that or not, that is a safeguard.
ROLE OF THE CHURCH - in Matthew 11 the adults in a generation were unwilling to worship with and play with the children. Teens are being raised without a theological voice in their life that is relative to them. And every week the Church is missing in the sexuality discussion is too long. The Church needs to understand cultural issues much better and get our platform back and speak to the issues of sexuality from a biblical perspective must be a priority in the Church. We cannot raise another generation who is void of Theological fortitude.
Conversations With Teenagers
Of the teens that I have spoken to who are addicted to pornography, never have I found one of them to be happy or celebrative about that. Not once have I met a teenager who said they would trade healthy relationships for their social media addiction. Not once has a teen admitted to me that they enjoy getting bullied or returning the violence. I have never heard a teenager seriously say to me that family doesn't matter and they don't need a mom or a dad or a brother or a sister. And un-Churched students have told me many times, I am unfulfilled in my life even though I have everything. God and the Church is the answer for the hole in every person's soul.
Fighting the Human Trafficking phenomenon requires our step by step dealing with each of these sectors in the life of our teenagers. If we can raise a healthy generation of young people in these 5 areas, everyone wins. And our generation puts a death sentence on dysfunctional sexuality and everything that it causes.